If you see Canaan, tell him that yes we are still mad at him for all that nothing he did; follow your dreams was meant literally back then; Jacob is living a bad porn from the 70’s…. or is it a really great one…
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Sarah is dead and Abraham waits nearly 16 minutes to remarry; the venison obsessed Isaac gets himself kicked out of every town from here to Beersheba for just plain being too awesome. Don’t ask him to tell own sons apart, though.
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Abraham is a murderous psychopath; God is a forgetful moron whose hobbies include asking questions he already knows the answer to, and putting people through bizarre tests of faith he already knows the results of.
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Genesis gets raunchy… you won’t even believe the kind of crap that happens in this episode. Warning, the subject matter gets a little gruesome. Ok you are warned.
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The bible takes a turn for the boring, but is revived by some good old fashioned polygamy. Also, I misspoke and said validify instead of validate…. I’m still feeling embarrassed.
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In part 2 of indeterminable, God is on his period and decides to kill everything ever, meanwhile Noah gains favor with the lord for being completely average.
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Hey everyone,
I have released the introductory podcast and episode 1. I will be releasing an episode per work day from here on out. It’s about a 45 minute podcast per day, which may be a lot for some of you, but in order to reach my goal of getting through the bible in a year, it has to be that way. Please listen and enjoy!!
Ok I just re-listened to Episode 1 and I’d just like to say that it definitely took me a minute to get used to this medium. I still think it is funny and worth listening to, but I get much better at it as I go along! So bear with me!
Episode 1 of Thomas and the Bible. Things get a little heated in the garden of Eden. Adam and Eve can’t find a damn thing to do. Meanwhile, God is worried that the Holy Ghost is not the woman he thought she was.
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In this introductory podcast I talk about the purpose, my goals, my background, and some things we need to keep in mind going forward.
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